Leftover Chinese Talks to a Dozen Strangers at Once

Scene - Conference Room. Time - 9:30am. Conversation - Corporate something or other.

Actually, they're not strangers and I know them "professionally" but I know nothing about their lives and nothing about what makes them tick. I did, however, hold their attention (and kept myself from spacing out) for what turned into a two hour meeting. I feel sorry for the folks that had to listen in via the telephone. Thirty page powerpoint presentation? Check. Fifty-odd pages of sample reports? Check. What did I do to prepare for this meeting last night? watched the Sox throw a one-hitter.

Highlights/Tricks to keep them interested:

- Sprots related Ice breaker: "I was at the Sox game last night and...and well, anyway...let's get started."
- Constant: "Good question, we'll get to that later in the presentation."
- Worst Equivocation ever: "We've gone from using two cans connected to a string to...um...being in the same room."
- Treated!: "Yes, that number is accurate...the number you're thinking of shows up if you keep reading the sentence." (I didn't say it quite like that)
- Short-term Memorization/References to people in the room: "Going back to what ____ asked about twenty minutes ago, this particular power point slide says this..."
- Worst conclusion ever: "Any questions? Okay....off we go."

Off we go.

. . [~] . 0 (Grumble) Grumbles .